The cat and catpot

Ok. So my morning started out like many others. The alarm goes off, I'm wondering who is making all that racket at 5 in the morning.  Then come to realize it's my alarm and  I have to rollover to shut it off. Unfortunately it's on the floor out of arms reach. I get up, hobble over to it. I have to hobble because my legs obviously didn't hear the alarm and they're still sleeping. Shut it off and sit on the edge of the bed.
  Needless to say I doze off again, and wake up hurdling from the center of an abyss to middle earth. Actually, I fell on my pillow. My pillow never felt so soft!
 If I don't get up now, then the kids will be late for school. So I go through the house flipping on the lights in the kids bedrooms. One by one, there's a soft groan of disbelief. Then it hits them and an exasperated sigh fills the air. SCHOOL. But it's Friday. OH FRIDAY!
  Needless to say, I'm not good at the days of the week. They all seem to run together to me. One big blur. Like looking in the steamy mirror after a really hot shower. You hope it's you you're looking at. Kind of looks like you, but fuzzier. I wipe the mirror, yup. It's me. Not Thelma Hayek or Sandra Bullock, but me. Same ole same ole, just more tired.
 Friday. My cat loves Fridays. It's the day she's allowed to go 'illegal'. I give her catnip. I call it cat pot. As soon as she sniffs it, man she's wild. 
 No sooner do I step foot on the bottom step she's prilling and rubbing her head into my calves. As I walk, this is happening. Can't count how many times I've had to high step just so I don't step on her. Furball! When I get to her food bowl to check food and water she starts this low throaty meow. Honestly sounds like she ate the Tom that's outside. She doesn't meow and then purr.....this is straight out meow meow meow constantly. No breathing required.
 Afraid the whole neighborhood's gonna wake up I grab the cat pot. Now she's spastic sitting like a mere-cat on her hind legs meowing, purring, prilling all at the same time. I grab a pinch and put it on the floor. She sniffs and snorts and blows it everywhere then chases me down for more.
 Every Friday I go back into the room and gather all the pot in one place so she's happy. She ROLLS in it. Now it's everywhere again. UGH!
 This is the cat that licks herself constantly. Not a hair out of place. She sits up straight like a show cat, all four paws touching each other with her tail wrapped around them. She takes up a whole 4 inch circle! She's so pristine and dainty. But give her some pot and she looses all her femininity. Right out the window. The hussy!
 Now she's high. Her eyes are huge and she's running all over the place. Her imaginary friends become evil terrorists and she's trying to capture and destroy. Quickly losing interest in the terrorists she spies a piece of food.Gathering herself into a little ball, with her butt in the air wiggling, she springs into action! This small morsel becomes a soccer ball and she's going for the winning goal.
 SCORE! SCORE! SCORE! She jumps on the kitchen table with sheer excitement, then tries to pounce on the sofa. SPLAT! (I thought cats land on their feet every time?) Needless to say, this doesn't stop her. Nothing can stop her! She's 'Invinc-a-Cat'! 
 Then as she comes down, she eats the soccer ball, goes to the sofa to look out the window. Yup, the birds are still there. She makes her way upstairs to my bed where she curls into a ball, with her head looking straight up at the ceiling, to sleep........until 3 pm. Now that's the life. 
Me? I feed the baby, do the dishes and hope to get in a nap today.